Please. I would like this.

I know it’s not cool to admit to liking Twitter, nonetheless I’m now not afraid: Fuck, I like Twitter. I like studying tweets, I like tweeting. I’m any such twitcuck I genuinely pay for Twitter Blue. I don’t care who’s conscious of it. I awaken inside the morning and the primary aspect I do is unhinge my jaw like a snake, hearth up Twitter, and gobble down a large quantity of tweets. On my deathbed, I’ll examine my pretty family and hoarsely whisper, “I easiest want I had extra time to spend finding out tweets.”
It’s clear that issues on Twitter will alternate under Elon Musk’s possession. The popular assumption is that Musk will intestine moderation, ease the insurance policies, and permit again all types of unsavory shitheads. As tech columnist Casey Newton talked about, the expectation has been that it might be similar to the Joker releasing the criminals from Arkham Asylum.
Musk has already mentioned that he plans to dispose of lifetime bans, though it isn’t precisely clear what in order to suggest. Does it suggest that he disagrees with the overall concept of a life-time ban and wishes to create a number of sort of restorative justice framework for repeat offenders inside the longer term? Or can we rapidly see a parade of ghoulies like Charles Johnson and Milo Yiannopoulos once more on the platform? At present, Musk launched plans for a number of sort of a committee to deal with main protection decisions:

In the meantime, the Washington Publish talked about right now that trolls are flocking to Twitter to submit offensive hate speech. However out of the three tweets that it describes had been taken down from the online web page some hours later. One other tweet said of merely the n-phrase repeated time and again could nonetheless be up. However there’s by no means been a ban on tweeting merely that phrase via itself. Nothing appears to have modified moderation-sensible however. However the trolls have made their level, noisily: “We’re right here, we’re parts of shit, get used to it.” It’s intimidation, and it’s working.
It’s unimaginable to anticipate correct now what’s going to seem to Twitter inside the quick or long run. For all the saber-rattling Musk is doing about “unfastened speech,” the reality is that most of the coverage and moderation work is much less about edgy “wrongthink” within the US and larger about complying with restrictive authorized pointers in different nations. Or it’s dealing with plain classic harassment. It’s tough to guess what the impact of letting a number of dipshits returned onto the platform could have on those larger-image issues that Twitter has spent the last few years cleansing up.
I’m an optimist, admittedly on occasion naively so. I would like to think about that Twitter may alternate, and quite a few these modifications I may not like, nonetheless they obtained’t be so terrible. I wish to agree with that it’s not going to emerge as 4chan, overrun with shitlords. I moreover wish to trust it gained’t die a gradual lack of life as the results of dwindling usership and choked-off gross sales.
I wish to consider Twitter will nonetheless be OK, as a result of I like Twitter. How can you go surfing and spot one thing like this and now not adore it?

However I don’t simply love the jokes, I like all of it: the subtweets, the humblebrags, the draggings, the ratios, the dunks, the milkshake geese, the tweetstorms, the nameflames. I obtained’t apologize for this. That is me, that’s who I’m. I like Twitter, and I don’t care who’s conscious of it.
For those who made it all the manner through to the cease, I notice you’re similar to me: not sizzling ample for Instagram, too lazy for Substack. Twitter is our superb candy spot. That is our heaven. I can’t lose this. We will’t.